Pressure that pushes back
Adjustable intensity across [INSERT REAL NUMBER] speeds. Lean in for deep, sit tall for gentle. You decide how hard it works — not a fixed setting someone else chose for you.
Palma · kneading neck & shoulder massager
It has fingers. That's the whole point.
Eight silicone nodes knead in slow circles under warm pads. Odd to look at. Very hard to give back.
Put it on my shoulders- Free US shipping
- 30-day returns
- [INSERT REAL WARRANTY TERM]
Drawn stand-in. Upload the hero cutout in Customize to replace it.
The offer
Buy two, get one free.
One for you, one for the person who keeps stealing yours, one for whichever room you end up in.
Every PALMA ships with a USB-C cable, a travel bag and a quick-start card.
No product selected
Add PALMA under Products with one variant per bundle option, then pick it in Customize › Offer › Product.
The 3pm hunch
Tension doesn't build in one dramatic moment.
You noticed it around 3pm, hunched toward a second monitor. Again in the car, shoulders somewhere near your ears. Again at bedtime, scrolling, chin down, that familiar band of tightness across the top of your back.
You've bought the heat pack that goes cold in nine minutes. The foam roller you can't get behind your own neck. The buzzy massager that hummed politely and changed nothing. It builds in a hundred small moments, and none of those things touched a single one of them.
Shot 2 · macro
Silicone nodes mid-rotation, slightly squished against a shoulder.
Kneading, not buzzing
Vibration sits on the surface. This grips.
Most cheap massagers vibrate. It tickles, it hums, it fades into background noise in about ninety seconds. PALMA doesn't vibrate. Eight soft silicone nodes rotate in opposing circles, gripping and releasing the muscle the way a thumb does. You lean back into it and the pressure pushes back. Add the warm pads and the whole thing goes from novelty to that end-of-day sigh. That's the difference between something touching you and something actually working.
Three reasons it stays out on the couch
Warmth that stays warm
Heat pads glow across both shoulder pads and hold temperature the whole session. Not the nine-minute fade of a microwaved rice sock. Steady, even, and switchable if you'd rather go cold.
Hands-free, cord-free, anywhere
Drapes over your shoulders and stays put. Rechargeable, so there's no cord to wrestle across the couch. Cook, read, answer email, keep unwinding. Works on lower back and legs too.
Three steps, in order
-
1
Charge it fully, then drape it over your shoulders — nodes down, warm pads against the muscle.
-
2
Press once for kneading, again for heat, then pull down on the arm straps to add as much pressure as you want.
-
3
Let it run one session, take it off, and try to remember what you were tense about.
Honest about the trade-offs
| Feature | PALMA | Cheap vibrating massager | Professional massage |
|---|---|---|---|
| Sensation | Rotating nodes, real kneading motion | Surface buzz that fades fast | Trained human hands — still the gold standard |
| Heat | Built-in warm pads, full session | Rarely included, or barely warm | Optional, depends on the studio |
| Cost over a year | One payment of [INSERT REAL RRP] | Cheap, replaced often | [INSERT REAL LOCAL SESSION COST] a visit, repeatedly |
| Availability | Any night, on your own couch | Any night | Booked days ahead, business hours |
| The catch | It's a machine, not a person — and it looks bizarre | Costs little because it does little | Best experience, worst logistics |
Swipe the table sideways →
Social proof
People who also thought it looked ridiculous
[Insert real review]
First-reaction angle. Name, city, verified-purchase tag, photo with the product actually on their shoulders.
[Insert real review]
Desk worker / long hours angle.
[Insert real review]
"Tried everything else" angle.
[INSERT REAL REVIEW COUNT AND AVERAGE RATING — publish only once verified]
Still here?
Buy two, get one free.
Same offer as the top of the page. You just had more questions, which is fair.
Every PALMA ships with a USB-C cable, a travel bag and a quick-start card.
No product selected
Add PALMA under Products with one variant per bundle option, then pick it in Customize › Offer › Product.
Before you ask
The eight things people email us about.
How long does delivery take?
[INSERT REAL PROCESSING TIME] to process, then [INSERT REAL TRANSIT WINDOW] anywhere in the US. Tracking lands in your inbox the moment it ships.
What's the warranty?
[INSERT REAL WARRANTY TERM AND COVERAGE]. If it fails on us, we sort it out.
What if I don't like it?
Thirty days. Use it, judge it, and if it's not for you send it back for a full refund. [CONFIRM RETURN SHIPPING POLICY — who pays.]
How long does the battery last?
About [INSERT REAL BATTERY LIFE FROM TESTING] per full charge, roughly [INSERT REAL SESSION COUNT] sessions. A full recharge takes [INSERT REAL CHARGE TIME] over USB-C.
Is it loud?
There's a low mechanical hum from the motor — [INSERT REAL DECIBEL OR EVERYDAY COMPARISON FROM TESTING]. You can hold a conversation over it and watch TV without turning the volume up.
How warm do the pads get?
Warm and steady, not hot. [INSERT REAL TEMPERATURE RANGE FROM TESTING]. Heat is optional — one button turns it off entirely.
Is it safe to use?
Keep sessions to about 15 minutes and take a break before going again. Use it over clothing or a thin layer if you have sensitive skin, and never fall asleep wearing it. If you're pregnant, have a pacemaker or other implanted device, reduced skin sensation, a recent injury or surgery, or any ongoing condition affecting your neck, back or shoulders, check with your doctor before use. Not for children.
Is it electrically certified, and what plug does it use?
[CONFIRM UL/ETL CERTIFICATION WITH SUPPLIER]. It charges by USB-C from a standard US two-prong wall adapter.
Stop scrolling. Start unwinding.
Tonight your shoulders will do exactly what they did last night. Or PALMA turns up, looking absurd, and quietly loosens what the day tightened.
Put it on my shoulders